I’ve decided to move over to blogspot to make things a little easier on myself. Please join me there!


The basics

The basics for now.

  • Sadly the baby wasn’t meant to stay with us and only measured 7w3d (2 days of growth) with no heartbeat.
  • I am getting a D&C tomorrow evening and thankfully Dr. M will be performing the surgery
  • We are absolutely crushed and don’t understand why this is happening to us over and over again.
  • A fertility specialist is next.

More later.

It’s time!

I fully expect to be told that there’s no heartbeat. I just know that’s what will happen and it TERRIFIES me. Every other miscarriage was natural. The first was a complete shock and surprise. The others we tried to stay positive but they also took us by surprise.

I really, really don’t want to have to hear the ultrasound tech tell me, “I’m sorry. There’s no heartbeat.” Let’s hope that I get to update with better news this afternoon…

Not a good feeling

I woke up this morning feeling as though something wasn’t right. I can’t explain it but it’s made me feel anxious and nervous all morning. Then, shortly after waking up I started to feel as I normally┬ádo before Aunt Flow shows up: it’s not cramps but there’s definitely something going on in my uterus. It’s an awful feeling.

I’ve tried really, really hard to remain optimistic throughout this pregnancy and with the exception of a few days, I have done really well. But right now it’s getting tough.

Tomorrow will be 9 weeks based on LMP. Nugget was 7w1d last Thursday so theoretically she should be 8w1d WITH a heartbeat. I really hope everything is okay but I can’t shake the feeling that I’ll be going to see Ellen after my ultrasound to get a D&C scheduled.

Just a little over 24 hours. Go time, go!